Come With Me

Any of my friends will tell you I am almost the perfect shopping companion as I can put together the flawless outfit for any occasion. You want a dress that shows a little cleavage, I know exactly where to go for that. Looking for that jaw dropping, head turning New Years Eve outfit, hang with me and sweet success will be yours. Most of my friends who need shopping advice or assistance come to me for guidance. After years of doing this I have come to be considered a shopping authority and this knack for shopping makes me very popular, sometimes at the most inopportune times. When I have an essay due for 262 and someone needs a hot dress for Saturday night, what’s a girl to do? Don’t tell my instructor, but the shopping usually wins.




Before we embark on our shopping expeditions I lay down certain ground rules. If we follow these our chances of success increase exponentially. The more we deviate from the system I lay out, the chance of failure goes up greatly. The last time someone didn’t follow the game plan the outfit she came away with was too hideous for even Blackwell’s worst dressed list. And she wondered why there was no second date?



First you must allot enough time to complete the mission and yes this is a mission. Weak of heart or body can just go to the local big box store and purchase a mannequin outfit, but if you stick with me that mannequin won’t be able to hold a candle to you. This will be a trip that will entail at least a half a dozen stores and possibly more than one city. We may start in Bangor and end in Portland, after all the perfect pair of shoes knows no city limits.



Once we start you must buy the clothing part first. We will buy accessories, shoes; whatever else you may want only after we have in our possession the main attire. I have been with those who fall in love with a necklace or a pair of shoes and buy them first, only to spend hours searching for the outfit to compliment them. It is much more difficult to dress the accessory than accessorize the dress. They may be the "neatest" pair of neon green stilettos you have ever seen, however if the only dress you look decent in is an orange one, those green stilettos have just become the "neatest" dust collectors in your closet.



Next, you will spend time in the outfit before you purchase it. You will try it on; you will walk in it and sit in it. Holding it up in front of you will not work, nor will just putting it on and standing in front of a mirror. You have to spend some time in it to see how it moves with you. If it is uncomfortable or horribly wrinkled after 10 minutes, then spending an evening in it is probably not going to work. How miserable is your night going to be if every time you move, you’re picking your dress out of your butt because it doesn’t sit right?



After the main purchase is made, we will take a break. We may do lunch, dinner, or drinks depending on the time of day. Well the type of meal depends on the time of day; alcohol recognizes no such time boundaries. This is a mandatory break, because the sensory overload the stores have put us in need of time to calm down. After we have sat for at least 45 minutes we can continue on with the undertaking.



This is the point where you need to be prepared to back track. Odds are we have already seen the perfect pair of shoes for the dress you have or the bra that is going lift those bad boys back to where they were when you were sixteen. Oh and the glitter of jewelry. Which of those sparkling gems is going to be the one that will make your outfit a head turner?



Shopping for the perfect item is not an easy task. It is work and not meant for whiners or those without stamina. But if you come with me and play by my rules I can guarantee you, we will end the day with exactly what you are looking for.